Showing posts with label not myself these days. Show all posts
Showing posts with label not myself these days. Show all posts

Tuesday, October 22, 2013

Rambling

It appears that I have the attention span of a flea or a gnat or some other buzzing, hovering bug that flits fast from one place to another.  Is it my ADD?  Have I nurtured this problem by surfing Facebook and Pinterest for fast images and information and for a wonderful way to waste time?

I'd like to get back into writing this blog.  As some of you know, I had a previous blog for about five years in which I wrote at least half a dozen posts each month.  A lot of things have changed for me in the past two years and I am working on just being whole, healed, and at rest in the arms of Jesus.

I gave up writing my blog and I gave up reading other blogs.  Information overload of a different kind.

Now I want to just write.  Poems, lines of prose, dreams, fears, hurts, stories....But it is not coming easily to me.  Nor are my other plagues such as a consistently clean and organized house.  Nor is my favorite hobby of reading.

So, this is it for today.  Hopefully, I will be heard from again in sooner than four months.



Sunday, June 9, 2013

Past My Bedtime

Shhh...it's 9:38pm and it's past my bedtime.  Hubby usually calls bedtime for everyone at 9pm because, well, HE has to wake so early in the morning for work.  But it is summer, after all, and we are changing up the routine a little.  Our son is currently in the den spending time with our other family, the Robertsons.  You know, from Duck Dynasty.  No matter that Papaw Phil and Uncle Si have told him all those stories a dozen times by now.

Myself, I'm not sleepy.  I think I may or may not have had 2 or 3 naps today, helped along by thunder and pouring rain.  Several quite soothing storms that rocked me to sleep like a baby. 

"I need to write, I need to write, I need to write....." said the exhausted 41-year-old mother of the teenager.  I've never gotten the hang of handling life easily, of caring for others and a home and myself all with perfect balance.  So the home and self slide until we are quite messy.

But others tell me I cannot allow myself to get overwhelmed.  When I find it happening I have to ask myself what the benefit of it is. 

I have to get in touch with my Natural Child and when I do, I will be closer to who I was always meant to be.

I have to take care of myself with enough food and sleep and plenty of time for play, which for me is reading.  If I'm having trouble reading, it's a big indicator something is wrong.

Son will be headed off on a mission trip in two weeks.  Husband and I are heading off for a little getaway of our own, where we can hike to waterfalls and fish and swim and go to museums when we are dry and try at least one swanky restaurant, eating mostly out of our refrigerator in our hotel room.  We will in our room early each evening to stretch out on the king-size bed.  Hubby to no doubt watch some sports on TV.  And me to read and write and try to get back in the swing of life.

Such are the things of dreams and disturbances.  Things that keep me awake and things that lull me to sleep.